A JOYFUL ALTERNATIVE APPROACH TO CHRISTMAS

I love Christmas in a similar way I love the other seasonal celebrations through the year (May Day, Spring solstice, mid summer etc) but there is something especially cozy and magical about Christmas time. Dave and I have talked a lot about how we want to celebrate it, and over the last few years have established some rhythms and traditions that we all love and that align with our family values too. I thought i’d share some of the ways we approach Christmas here, a sort of alternative view I suppose.

The experiences and people

We try to focus most on the experiences of Christmas- the people we’ll see, the food we’ll eat, the activities we’ll do together, more than the gifts. Although we do talk about gifts too. So, in our chats about Christmas, it’s a bit more geared toward the experiences and when we talk about gifts, I’m just as excited as the kids- this is still a big part of Christmas. But we’ll also talk about what gifts we’re buying or making for other people, as well as what we want to receive. Frankie LOVES making her Christmas cards each year. More so than receiving them! She also loves making watercolour portraits for people too (and also, they’re incredible)

Winter magic

We focus a lot on what’s happening in the season, especially the lovely bits! Ice patterns (‘Jack Frost has been’!), dragons breath in the mornings, monitoring how many leaves are left on the trees, spotting winter colour. I love bringing it indoors at Christmas too. There is greenery everywhere ! Hosting workshops means I am extra motivated to get everything ready! I probably wouldn’t have dressed the house quiiiite as much if I hadn’t been hosting stuff, but to be honest it was a nice excuse. I light the candles every day, starting at breakfast time, and the kids really notice and appreciate it. Auden especially adores candles (or ‘tambles’). We love lighting the fire too- it’s like a major family event. We go for walks and collect stuff, point out what’s happening, and read books about it too. All of these things add to a feeling of magic that I don’t feel I am quite managing to put into words here! It’s small things though. Small moments of magic.

The Winter Solstice

Connected to the previous point, we also celebrate the solstice in quite a big way. The winter solstice is on Sunday the 22nd December, and it marks the shortest day of the year. From that point onwards, light begins to slowly increase each day- what better thing to celebrate?! I love celebrating that pivot point in the season, and there is all sorts of symbolism to do with dark and light to meditate on too. We'll cook a roast (a good opportunity to practice our vegan nut roast for Christmas day!) and bake a cake (I’m going to attempt to make chocolate trees for the top of it) and give our kids some of their presents early. We’ll also go for a walk if we can fit it in around the cooking. The activity for that day will be to make solstice crowns out of foraged greenery- guess who's most excited about that?!

An activity advent calendar.

Each year we hang some sort of branch and attach our Numero 74 advent pouches. Each pouch contains a handwritten activity card. I put planned external events in there, like Christmas crafts at school, Christmas market, Christingle service, school party, town carols. I also include activities we’ll do together like read Christmas books by the fire, make cards, bake, go on a torch/lantern walk around the park to see the stars. I sometimes put an item in the bag that connects to the activity- ie Christmas shaped cookie cutters for the baking activity, a torch for the torch walk etc- things we already have. There is also the occasional chocolate coin- maybe once a week. Both kids love it so far! I thought Auden would be asking for chocolate all day but he hasn’t! He’s delighted when his sister gets a coin for him, but seems otherwise unfazed by it. A Christmas miracle. We also count down to Christmas with traditional advent candles too, which you can see in the photo of the advent calendar below.

Giving Back

We go through toys and books and donate good quality ones. I have styled Christmas events for vulnerable people locally. We donate as much as we can possibly afford to the local food bank (call them first to see what they need), and I have also volunteered with them in the past too. It’s not much, and we want to do more, but it feels like an important part of Christmas, more so this year than usual.

Choosing the eco option

We have used fabric wrapping for many years now and will continue to do so. We re-use the same pieces of fabric too, and the ribbon! We use it like normal wrapping paper and stick it together with paper tape, or tie it in a knot. We try to buy second hand or from charities like The National Trust. we’ll be cooking veggie/vegan food.

The tree

After a few failed attempts at buying a potted tree, I just couldn’t bring myself to kill another one this year! So instead, we have a Christmas Branch (this was the subject of my feature in The Observer last week- still pinching myself about that!). I’d much rather forage for something (in this case from my friends bonfire pile) for free, and with zero environmental impact. It’s decorated with things we have had for years, or natural finds; I made some little posy baubles, strung up some shells, tied bits of botanically dyed ribbon to the branches (made by The Natural Dye Works)

I also have some new decorations this year, the moon phases and moon topper from Workshop ltd, and a few recycled papier mache Toast baubles too- (those were press gifts as part of the Observer shoot.) The kids have their own tree, It’s an artificial one I got from a charity shop 2 years ago. It’s covered in charity shop tinsel, flashing lights and baubles. It’s polar opposite to my beloved branch, but I love it all the same.

Gifts

Less has been the goal here, and second hand where possible. We have arranged with Dave’s family to do a Secret Santa for the adults with a £20 limit, and with my family we do no presents for the adults. This makes things much easier, cheaper and less stressful to manage. Dave and I wont do gifts and my friends don’t do christmas presents either (but rather do birthday gifts). We also buy second hand as much as we can. If we have time we’ll trawl the charity shops, but this year i’ve bought second hand things via eBay. Frankie is getting a second hand denim jacket and Lucky Voice Karaoke set, for example. We bought some new things from The National Trust shop too (which supports the charity): a bike helmet for Auden, a mini swing to take on walks to the woods with us and a little wooden snake. We are also making Auden more playdough (we did the same last year and he loved it) and there will be some experiences we’ll do together too.

I find not buying or receiving many presents quite easy. Gift giving isn’t one of my ‘love languages’ (look it up if you’re not sure what I’m on about!) so I don’t want to be ‘holier than thou’ about present buying. I know that there are plenty of ways to do present buying in a thoughtful way, I am just grateful I only have to buy a few kids presents- 6 kids in total.

Christmas Eve/Father Christmas.

My sister in law does a Christmas eve box for the cousins and children, and we all get together, eat a meal and watch a film. This is one of our favourite traditions! When Frankie was 3 she was really upset by the idea of Father Christmas coming into her bedroom (I mean, rightly so- sounds pretty creepy when you think about it?!) so we told her it wasn’t real, but that it’s something fun to choose to believe in. This seems to have worked really well. She chooses to believe it, and so do we, but she knows it’s not real. I think this makes her feel quite grown up, and she hasn’t told any of her friends either. Christmas still feels magical without this belief too, for all the reasons I’ve listed above. So when we get home on Christmas Eve we put out some port and a mince pie for Father Christmas too.

Christmas Day

It’s just the 4 of us on Christmas morning which we love. We’ll cook a special breakfast (I’m thinking make-ahead vegan french toast bake?) and light the fire. We say that the stockings are ‘from’ Father Christmas (cue knowing looks between me and Frankie) and the presents under the tree are from us. At around 11, we’ll walk over to my in-law’s house for a big roast and to slump onto the sofas for the afternoon. Daves sister and her family will then come over to ours for Christmas evening and stay over and we’ll eat copious amounts of cheese, crackers, and chocolate.

Can you tell I’m excited?

This post has ended up being really long, but it also felt lovely to spend some time writing about it - it’s been a while since I’ve had the time to blog like this! I have actually been writing this for weeks but finished it today. In light of the election, this was pure escapism; a bit of joy. I needed it.

Anyway, I’d love to know about your favourite Christmas traditions too. And below are some photos from the last couple of weeks. Foliage, foliage and more foliage basically. Some wreath commissions, some photos I’ve taken for projects, others are just phone snaps.

A few of these images are taken from my Christmas styling guide! The mantlepiece greenery installation and hallway arch garland for example. You can read more about the guide (and how to make them! here)

aaaaand you can make a wreath like the ones above using my tutorials here